Samsung Needs To Hire Someone Else To Name Their Phones

If you couldn't tell from reading this blog (all 3 of you), I have a thing for cell phones.  As such, I find myself reading tech blogs pretty regularly to keep up to date on all the new phones about to hit the market.  Samsung, while generally good at putting out high quality phones, has a terrible track record when it comes to names.  Let's look at the past few names they've come up with for their handsets.

• Moment
• Mythic
• Vibrant
• Captivate
• Fascinate
• Galaxy
• :-) <---- worse fucking one ever

I mean, really?  We're just yanking random words out of the dictionary and sticking them at the end?  No rhyme or reason at all?  Awesome marketing! 

Chris Brown At The BET Awards

After being banned from last years BET Awards, Chris Brown finally got the opportunity to honor his idol.  I fancy myself as a huge Michael Jackson fan (both before AND after his untimely passing) and I have to say, I got goosebumps watching Chris perform.  From a purely dancing/rhythm/movement standpoint, he may be the closest thing we'll ever see.  I was very proud of what I saw and I only wish the politics and red tape hadn't gotten in the way of him doing this last year, when it would have had the biggest impact.

Then it came time for him to perform "Man In The Mirror", and he broke down and started crying; resulting in the audience finishing the lyrics instead.  It was awkward for a second, then it was moving and emotional.  But without fail, twitter became a stage for everyone to unleash their best Chris Brown joke. Everything from the crying being a publicity stunt to jabs at him being a wife beater to the "man-up-and-finish-the-song" comments.  It underscored a glaring issue I have with society: the disability (or the plain unwillingness) to forgive.  We are well over a year removed from what Chris did.  His career has suffered greatly because of it.  He's been the subject of jokes, criticism, disdain, and in some cases, outright hatred.  The reaction to his transgressions would be more understandable if they were applied equally to everyone.  But do people look at R. Kelly and say he should never perform again after engaging in sexual acts with minors?  Statutory rape and pedophilia is definitely not the kind of thing you should just shrug off.  Will NBA fans declare that Gilbert Arenas should never step foot on a basketball court again?  He did, after all, bring guns into a public facility where families (often with children) come to be entertained.  Guns kill people, and that's definitely not something you should sweep under the rug.  Where is the outrage for Ben Roethlisberger, who may or may not have raped a woman not once, but twice.  I could go on and on, really.

I do believe what separates Chris from the rest is the fact that his victim was famous, well known, and generally loved by the public.  Ben's (alleged) victim wasn't.  R. Kelly's victim wasn't.  Gilbert's potential victims weren't.  Since there's no real face to these people in the public eye, then who cares?  Let our beloved celebrities get back to entertaining us.  But since Chris beat Rihanna, whom many people idolize, that's crossing the line.  

One crime, whether it's rape, weapon possession, battery, isn't better or worse than the other.  Chris doesn't deserve the hate that other famous criminals seem to have dodged.  If it's your choice to vilify Chris for the rest of his life, then so be it.  You just remember that the next time your favorite entertainer steps on the wrong side of the law.

Fuck It [Fuck It]

iPhone 4 is dope and I'm buying one. Don't even care no more.

This Whole iPhone 4 Broo-hah-hah

The internet has already jumped on all the problems people are having with the iPhone 4.  Since the phone has been officially available to the public for less than 48 hours, I'm not gonna jump on Apple too much because that's to be expected anytime a new tech device hits the market.  My issue is more about Apple's insistence on being one of the worse companies in terms of policy and how they deal with their (sometimes questionably) loyal customers.

The two main issues with the phone so far are actually pretty big.  The first being the discoloration of the phone's display.  This is magnified by the fact that the so-called "Retina Display" is among the phone's biggest selling points.  The issue is blamed on a manufacturing oddity that should (maybe) correct itself in a short amount of time.  But after braving lines, pre-order madness and dropping loads of dough on this hyped new device, that's something customers shouldn't have to deal with in my eyes and it shows a poor sense of oversight on Apple's part.  The bigger issue is the reception problems that stems from covering the left side of the phone with your hand while using it.  Apple has acknowledged the issue and has basically told customers to either "stop holding it that way" or "shell out $29 bucks for a case that prevents you from having to hold it and block the antenna."

Are.  They.  Fucking.  Serious?

So you ship a phone that you KNOW has a reception issue (already a sore spot with iPhone owners, but that's a whole 'nother issue), and your answer is to muck it up or keep it moving?  That is unacceptable.  The sad part is people are so enamored with their Jesus phone that they won't even see the wrong in this situation.  They'll continue to play by Apple's rules, giving them passes on every transgression they heap upon them.  Apple needs to understand one thing:  they are no longer the big man on campus.  The Droid Incredible was already bad enough, but the Droid X is about to drop in a month or so and that could seriously eat the iPhone's lunch.  People are open to things other than iPhones now.  They can no longer act like their phones will sell themselves.

The Internet Is Improving/Fucking Up The Music Industry

I'm not gonna make this about illegal downloading/pirating.  That actually has nothing to do with what I'm about to say.  I do, however, believe the internet is having two very important effects on the music industry right now that are exciting and frightening at the very same time.

First, the good news.  The internet has become a viable medium for artists to reach their fans.  We're more likely to head to youtube to see a new video than watch 106&Park.  An artist can throw a mixtape on their personal website and toss the link to their twitter followers and instantly reach hundreds of thousands of fans without the need for a record label.  It's ironic that the same methods that have been used by indie artists looking for their big break are now being utilized even more efficiently by those who are already in the bright lights.  We clearly haven't escaped the need for record labels to feed music to the masses but it's nice to know that artists are reaching us in new ways and fans are actively seeking out good music rather than accepting what the suits at the top feed us.

But the bad thing is almost other side of the coin of the same good thing.  The accessibility that fans have is becoming an issue.  We know too much about the inner workings of the industry.  Hip hop blogs have been throwing up a new song release under the title of "Under Pressure" by Dr. Dre featuring Jay-Z.  Obviously this is a highly anticipated song but what I heard clearly wasn't the finished version.  The beat seemed a tad undercooked, there was no hook (at all), only two verses, and not even mastered.  I can't imagine that a perfectionist like Dr. Dre, who's been holding this album close to his chest for over 10 years, would want us to hear the song in THIS condition.  Of course everyone wants to be the first to "break" the new song so no one thinks to themselves "this song is unfinished, why leak it", and the fans don't care that it's unfinished, they'll hit the internet and call it wack.  Next think you know, word on the street is the new Dre/Jay-Z song is garbage.  And they don't even know what the full song sounds like.

There are pros and cons to everything but I think the ability for fans to now see through the curtain of the industry is doing more harm than good.  Fans feel entitled to anything and they consider themselves critics of everything that hits their ear.  Rather than enjoying the music, listeners throw salt and complain about everything, using the far reaching grasp of the internet as their platform.  I feel like I'm the last person left who just sits back, listens to the music I like and enjoys it.

Entirely Too Many Android Phones. Entirely.

For those keeping count, yes; I've jumped ship from a Blackberry enthusiast to an Android spokesperson to a bed buddy with Apple's iPhone in less than a year.  So what, don't judge me.  Familiarity with the three major smartphone platforms allows me to view them all more objectively.  Plus no real gadget head can talk his junk without having used them all.  That said, I'm noticing a slightly unsettling trend within the Android platform.  The same trend that was once an annoying issue amongst Blackberry critics: there's simply too many of them.

Let's look solely at the Android release history for Verizon Wireless.  In the past 8 months we've had: The Droid, Droid Eris, Devour, Droid Incredible, The Droid X (coming next month) and Droid 2 (coming soon after).  The Droid 2 will make the first Droid obsolete less than a year after it's release.  The Devour was a mistake to begin with.  Crappy version of Android and Verizon must have known this because I've not seen one advertisement for it.  Droid Eris was great as an more affordable Android phone but really, $100 isn't that much more to spend in the grand scheme of things to get a MUCH better phone.  The Incredible is about to be outdone in less than 2 months by the time the Droid X is released; it seems to outdo the Incredible in every meaningful category.  How will those who blew their upgrade on the Incredible feel?

I wrote an article not too long ago outlining this exact problem (also included in that argument was the Nexus One, which is no longer anywhere close to being the beast of a smartphone it was in January, but I digress).  One thing I didn't mention in that article was the one company that's seem to handle this problem perfectly: Apple.

Say what you want about them, but Apple has exactly the right platform for how to do a smartphone release.  There is only one iPhone.  You don't have to worry about a newer, faster, better, more powerful iPhone coming out 3 months after you blow $200-600 on your current iPhone.  Apple can take their time releasing subtle but useful updates to keep your iPhone feeling fresh and in a year or two, they'll hit you with the BIG update.  This to me makes far more sense than a bunch of manufacturers trying to out do one another in a dick measuring contest of Android power phones.  Because in the end, it's the consumer who's stuck with yesterday's phone the minute they walk out of the store.

Don't get me wrong, I LOVE the advancement in technology happening right now.  But it's very easy to see that this same advancement isn't exactly consumer friendly.

All The Motion Based Video Game Shit Is Getting Kinda Annoying

Nintendo inadvertently (or advertently, who the fuck knows) screwed up the video game industry forever when they introduced the Wii.  The Wii did something that no other system, PS2 included, had ever done; appealed to people who didn't like video games.  As Cracked has pointed out, this now introduces a problem for every video game developer because in order to not lose money and go bankrupt, they kinda have to follow suit.  And with that, originality in the industry is all but dead. Microsoft has Kinect (terrible name), PS3 has Move (boring name), and the Wii is still the Wii, albeit with an add on to the remote that makes it better at motion sensing (or so they say).  Regular ass games are gonna be the minority soon if things keep going in this direction and once that happens, you can count me out.  

The New Xbox 360 Is Sexy But Worthless If You Already Own An Xbox 360

The only real difference here is the built in wifi adapter (about fucking time), but realistically, it's not THAT much smaller than the 360 I currently own. And I've already been butt fucked into buying my wifi adapter so I've no use to run out and buy this one.  But it does look pretty fucking sweet.

Pictures via Gizmodo.com

Hollywood Is Fucking Up Comic Movies

I have come to the conclusion that these Hollywood movie studios have absolutely no interest in doing comic books justice on the big screen.  This is particularly sad considering all the hype being drummed up for the inevitable "Avengers" movie that'll be releasing in a few years.  Here's how I know they don't give a damn. 

You see this picture right here?  Her name is Amber Heard.  The producers of "X-Men: The First Class" are apparently looking to cast her as a young version of Mystique.  This alone shows the writers have no fucking idea how the story of the X-Men goes.  OMG...I feel a rant coming on.  Let's make a few things clear.

Doing a "first class" X-Men movie is fine, IF they stay true to who was in the first class: Cyclops, Jean, Ice Man, Beast and Angel.  I get the feeling they're not gonna do that.  They're gonna wanna throw in the popular X-Men that mainstream moviegoers are most familiar with.  Out of the three movies, only three of the five original members showed up consistently, two of the five didn't show up until the last movie, and one of those two only got 5 minutes of screen time, total.  A complete spit in the face to the true backstory of the most important characters in the franchise.  Mystique wasn't a part of the X-Men story when the team was first built (as evidenced by the fact that she's Rogue's mother, another grossly miscast character, but that's neither here nor there).  Including her in "young" form along with all the other young (re: original) X-Men means there's NO WAY there will be any truth to ANY kind of story they're gonna try and throw in our faces.  Note to Hollywood: special effects and cool actions scenes aren't enough to hide piss poor story telling.  The books are popular for a reason, and every time you make a movie disregarding the mythology of the book, you're pissing in the face of the faithful readers who made the books popular enough for you to cash in on.  Cut that shit out, thanks.

It Finally Happened. I've Crossed Over To The Darkside

You can ask anyone who knows me.  I've been a pretty anti-apple kinda person for quite some time now.  I've owned a smart phone for the better part of the last 5 years and never once considered Apple's offering.  I've bounced around between Blackberry, Android, even a Sidekick (rofl @ me, I know).  But I worked my ass off to steer clear of the Jesus Phone.  Part of that was because I was turned off by the snobby, elitist attitudes of iPhone owners (and apple fans in general).  And while that clearly doesn't apply to everyone, even the most levelheaded of apple users can't deny the pretentious nature of a lot of apple enthusiasts.  Another reason was my distaste for some of apple's business practices.  Strong arming developers and needlessly denying apps for stupid reasons doesn't seem too cool to me.  Then there was the fact that AT&T's network is pretty much ass cheeks.  But low and behold, the iPhone 4 is upon us and despite being the leading cell phone in the US for years now, it's FINALLY caught up to the other smart phones.  The copy and paste debacle is behind us, the OS has multitasking (gasp), and the phone itself has even been given an aesthetic makeover.  I tried not to fall for the hype, but I couldn't help myself.  I simply had to admit it: the new iPhone is pretty damn sweet.  My newfound tolerance for apple products even translated to a hands on w/ the iPad (a product I've trashed viciously on this very here blog in the past) and I found myself taking a liking to THAT device as well!  What the fuck has Steve Jobs done to me?!?  I guess it's one of those things that's just inevitable in life.  You can avoid it or delay it, but it's going to happen.  The iPhone will call you and when it does, you'll be powerless.  So long Android.  It's been real. 

Eminem - "Recovery" [Review]

Eminems lukewarmly received "Encore" album was released in 2004, and we were forced to wait 5 years for some new music.  Relapse was greeted with open arms and although no one placed it on the same lofty pedestal as "The Marshal Marthers LP", it was still a critical and commercial success.  Less than a year later we learned that "Recovery" would be releasing and as an Eminem fan, this made me extremely happy.  The one year gap is the shortest amount of time between releases in his career, which says to me that Slim has a chip on his shoulder.  And a hungry emcee usually means an emcee at the top of his game.  This could just be the Eminem fanboy in me speaking, but I think with "Recovery", that's precisely the case.

Seeing as how the leak is all we have to go by right now (I'm still buying when it releases, so shut up), I'm not 100% on the production credits.  But according to Wikipedia, Dr. Dre only produced 3 tracks on the entire album.  I knew Em wanted to work with new producers and I was very curious to see how this would pan out.  If you think about it, we've RARELY heard Em rhyme over anything but a Dre or Eminem beat (not counting features on other albums, which were also often Dre or Eminem beats).  It's an interesting sound that I happen to love.  "No Love", for example, features Lil' Wayne and is produced by Just Blaze.  A lot of folks on the internets trashed the song for using the "Night At The Roxbury" sample, but I happen to think the song works.  Much of the album is dedicated to his struggle with drugs and the recovery process.  But thankfully it's done in a way that comes across as informative rather than whiny and over emotional.  While not quite on the level of word wizardry that was "MMLP", Em's bars are still ridiculous as ever, and I dare a rapper to try and diss him right now.  "On Fire" in particular has list of quotables that some people may not fully grasp until next week.

Even with the great production and obviously great rhyming, there is one short coming to the album if I'm being 100% honest.  There's no light hearted humor here.  The skits are absent.  The signature silly lead single is nowhere to be found.  And while Em is sure to make you laugh out loud a few times throughout the album (as always), there's a decidedly more serious approach to the album as a whole.  This isn't necessarily a bad thing, but after literally laughing out loud to songs like "Marshal Mathers" and "Rain Man", the lack of humor and comedy on the album is a tad disheartening.

Another full length LP in 2011 may be asking a bit much, but I'm thrilled to have had Em give us two strong albums in back to back years.  Do yourself a favor and BUY this album when it's released!

Drake - "Thank Me Later" [Review]

I feel sorry for Drake.  I really do.  I mean, this kid came out a few years ago and was the toast of the Hip Hop town.  Everyone loved his mixtapes, guys quoted his punches and praised his ear for beats, and females dug the singy-song thing he had going on.  Then to top it off, he had Lil' Wayne (only the largest artist of the last two years) in his corner.  He was in the most envious position of any new artist in history. HISTORY.  But you'd know NONE of this if you were on twitter the day his album leaked.  He was getting trashed left and right.  I was really astounded by how few people were feeling the album.  I couldn't understand it at all.  But this is nothing new.  I've seen it happen plenty of times.  Fans turn on artists quicker than they can take a shower and change their draws.  The only flaw in the logic of these fans (and I use the term loosely) is "Thank Me Later" wound up being an improvement over "So Far Gone", the mixtape that shot Drake into superstardom.

Let's be clear, tho.  This album isn't perfect, nor do I think it's close to being the "classic" that a lot of people were hoping for.  While "Find Your Love" is a great example of what Drake can do when he's not rapping, "Shut It Down" and "Karaoke" are great examples of what can go wrong.  Those songs are not really fun to listen.  "Shut It Down" fails because it also features The Dream, a dude who ain't exactly the best singer on the planet.  So now we have two niggas who can't really sing trying to sing a full, 7 minute R&B song.  Do. Not. Want.

But the album definitely has some high points. "Fancy" is the best song, easily.  Swizz gives Drake an awesome beat, T.I. kinda steals the show with his guest appearance, and there's a very pleasant change up midway through that I wasn't expecting.  "Show Me A Good Time", produced by Kanye West, needs to be a single like yesterday.  Drake shouldn't have had Jay on the album because "Light's Up" really underscores the one problem with him as an artist: he's just an OK rapper.  He's not bad (not even close), but he's not super nice either.  He'll spit a dope line here and there but for the most part, it's straight forward, and his patterns never surprise you.  In the grand scheme of things, an ear for dope beats, a good delivery and lines that aren't wack are enough to carry you in this business, and Drake will do just fine for himself.  But when you're looking to be in the elite class of emcees, you have to impress people.  I think "Thank Me Later" is a good album, but not really good enough to impress anyone.  And with the short attention span of today's "fans", that's where Drake will feel the sting.